Famed mentalist Uri Geller may have fallen on hard times, if what sources tell me is true.
According to unconfirmed reports, Geller, famous for his spoon-bending exploits during the 70s and 80s, is going to be hired by a Moscow steak house to chill diners' forks with the power of his mind.
As a Kremlin-watcher told me, "The chilled fork craze has hit Moscow with a vengeance. Looking to get a leg up on the competition, the exclusive steak house will hire Uri Geller to freeze forks table-side while chatting with a customer base composed of mobsters, oligarchs and corrupt politicians.
"If successful, the program will grow to include the freezing of vodka shots."
reported by:
Dan Lee Hope, Jr.
Conspiracy Theories Curriculum
Edgar Allan Poe Community College
